A practice of attending to soul — the felt depth and meaning of things as they are lived.
A walking alongside
A companioning
A deep listening
Soul Accompaniment
What is soul accompaniment?
What I call “Soul accompaniment” is also popularly known as “spiritual direction” or “spiritual accompaniment”. It is a practice that has taken many forms across cultures and religious traditions, but generally united in a tending to the Mystery known by many names: ‘god’, the ‘sacred’, or the ‘universe’.
In Buddhist contexts, one might encounter the thera; in Sufi practice, the shaykh; in Hindu traditions, the guru. Within Christian traditions, there are figures such as the spiritual ‘father’ or ‘mother’, or ‘brother’ or ‘sister’; the staretz or ‘geronda’ of Eastern Orthodox mystical life; along with a wide range of more contemporary forms of companionship, support, guidance, and direction found across Catholic and evangelical contexts.
The ecumenical movement of the 20th century saw rich cross-fertilization of traditions from East and West, so that today there are as many flavours of spiritual direction as there are directors.
CONTEMPORARY PERSPECTIVES
Twentieth-century developments in psychology, anthropology and sociology led to radically new visions of what this spiritual relationship might look like. Since the late 60’s and 70’s training diverse training programs birthed generations of directors offering new approaches, often apart from established traditions. Some approaches have been process-oriented; others outcome-based. Developments such as feminist spiritual direction have re-examined the language we use for God, authority, and spiritual life, opening new ways of relating. Queer perspectives have brought added richness to the field questioning binaries, encouraging intersectionality and inspiring people to think ‘outside of the box’.
Jungian thought has reawakened, for many, what Episcopalian priest and Jungian analyst John Sanford called “God’s forgotten language” — the language of dreams — offering a bridge between inherited traditions and a more contemporary search for soul. (See Dreams and Imagination for how I incorporate this in Soul Accompaniment.)
The exploration of the depths of the ‘unconscious’, archetypes, and analysis of personality by Jung have bled into spiritual direction everywhere. One finds in the most unexpected places discussion of ‘introversion’ and ‘extroversion’, the ‘shadow’, ‘anima’ and ‘animus’, and many people have dabbled in the Myers-Briggs personality test in an attempt to understand themselves better.
A COMMON THREAD
Across these many forms of accompaniment, a common thread can be sensed: a relationship oriented toward deepening one’s connection with soul, with ‘God’ (or ‘goddess’, or ‘gods’), with the ‘numinous’, with ‘spirit’ — or simply with whatever is experienced as meaningful. As Rabbi Zari Weiss puts it, this may even be “the great whatever.”
MY OWN ORIENTATION
I have been shaped by both traditional and contemporary perspectives, but I do not limit myself narrowly to any. My own offering is unique to who I am. It is always important in seeking a spiritual companion, to find someone who feels right too for who you are.
Soul
I use the word soul — not in a fixed doctrinal or metaphysical sense, but as an inclusive way of speaking about the depth and texture of meaningful experience.
SPIRIT AND SOUL
In his essay Peaks and Vales, James Hillman describes the perspectives of spirit as mountain-like: concerned with ascent, transcendence, growth, and height. Yet mountains also have valleys between them, and it is here that he locates the perspectives of soul.
My use of soul does not exclude spirit but rather underscores the depth-perspectives in spiritual life more broadly speaking.
AFTER RELIGIOUS CONTROL
I find this breadth particularly helpful when there has been adverse religious experiences or spiritual abuse: it enables a shift from vertical controlling inner and outer systems to exploring meaning as it lives and breathes natively and uniquely to you.
HOW SOUL MAY APPEAR
Soul — and spirit — may appear through dreams, images, moods, prayer, ritual, relationship, grief, beauty, insight, struggle, nature, music, or ordinary moments of felt meaning. What is it that makes music ‘soulful’, friendship ‘good for the soul’, or a sunrise deeply moving?
You may understand soul differently — through God, divinity, psyche, spirit, imagination, or a broader sense of the numinous.
A SHARED LANGUAGE
These ways of knowing are not set aside. We meet in such a way that conversation can unfold within your own language, background, and experience, so that you may be accompanied in a way that is supportive of what is unique to you.
REMAINING IN RELATIONSHIP
For myself, the work is not ultimately to decide what soul is, but to remain in relationship with how it comes to us, and how it asks to be lived.
It is impossible to define precisely what the soul is. Definition is an intellectual enterprise anyway; the soul prefers to imagine.
— Thomas Moore, Care of the Soul
Accompaniment
I lean away from the vertical hierarchies sometimes found in ‘spiritual direction’.
I do not position myself as a guide, nor as someone who knows more about your life than you do.
If something is offered and it resonates, we can stay with it. If it does not, it is left aside.
This work is not about directing,
but about accompanying.
There can be a kind of quiet collapse in reducing a person to categories or conclusions — or even in in closing down what is still living by naming it too quickly.
Something is lost when irreducible difference is reduced into explanations, frameworks, or systems of control.
This work seeks to respond to this by making space for a different way of relating — a ‘decolonizing approach’ to spiritual life, ways of knowing, and the experience of soul.
Accompaniment begins with stopping and noticing, crossing over the invisible lines that separate us, making time to connect, to understand, and to respond. It depends on learning about the experiences of people and listening for the kinds of assistance that are welcomed, if any. It also crucially depends on understanding that as far apart as our individual fates seem from one another, they are ultimately intimately connected.
— Mary Watkins, 'Mutual Accompaniment and the Creation of the Commons'
What Happens in a Session
Beginning
Each session is a meeting —
with you, and with what is present.
There is no fixed agenda. We begin where you are. We cultivate a safe and grounded space.
You might bring:
something from your week
a dream or image
a feeling in the body
a question without clear words
Staying with Experience
We stay close to what is happening.
At times we speak, share, or ask questions
At times we sit in silence.
We may sit with something unclear or difficult
Or share and celebrate
Ways of Working
Some sessions include more focused practices.
Where it fits, we may draw on:
Embodied practices
Ritual or symbolic gesture
Creative response (voice, writing, image)
These are not used to fix, but to deepen contact.
We allow meaning for to emerge in its own way, and in its own time
Who This Work Might Be For
This work may resonate if:
you are seeking a place of quiet attention brought to your spiritual life — perhaps to deepen or simply to listen more deeply
you are moving through faith transition, or spiritual unravelling
your faith or spiritual orientation feels unsettled or uncertain
dreams, images, memory, place, or myth feel meaningful to you
you sense that something in you — or around you — is asking for attention, without needing to be analyzed or resolved
you have engaged spiritual direction before and are seeking a different kind of contemplative space
YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE IN CRISIS
Many people come simply because they sense there is more at work in their lives — and desire time and space to attend to and deepen this awareness.
Others seek a reflective space to explore new ways of relating to the sacred, or to notice more closely what is unfolding within their spiritual life.
You are welcome to bring what is drawing your attention, and we attend to it together with openness and care.
If you are uncertain or have questions, I warmly invite you to send a brief message and share what you are noticing or wondering about.
A NOTE ON SCOPE
Please note: While there may be some overlap in a shared concern for wellbeing — and while psychology recognizes the value of religious experience — this work is not therapy. I do not offer diagnosis, treatment, or professional advice (legal, medical, financial, or otherwise).
A Trauma-Informed Approach
This work is shaped by an awareness that people carry experiences which may not be fully spoken, integrated, or resolved. For this reason, the space is held with care.
AT YOUR OWN PACE
Not to draw things out, not to push toward insight, but to allow experience to be met at a pace that feels possible.
There is no pressure to explain or disclose. What is said — and what is not said — are equally respected.
We move at the pace of your nervous system. Slowness is welcome. Pauses are welcome. There is no need to push beyond what feels steady or manageable.
NOT INTERPRETED OR DIAGNOSED
You are not interpreted or diagnosed. Your experience is not reduced to a framework or theory but approached as something with its own depth and meaning.
You remain the authority in your own life. Nothing is imposed. Direction is not given. If something offered does not resonate, it is left aside.
RELATIONAL AWARENESS
Relational dynamics are held with awareness. Expectations, projections, and patterns may arise — as they do in any human encounter. These are not taken up as authority, but gently returned, so that your own sense of self can deepen.
The aim is not dependency, but capacity. Over time, the work supports your ability to remain with your own experience, in your own way.
A SPACE OF ACCOMPANIMENT
This is not a space for fixing, solving, or directing. It is a space in which something of your life — however it appears — can be met, accompanied, and gradually come into its own depth.
FURTHER RESOURCES
This approach is informed by contemporary understandings of trauma, including the work of the Blue Knot Foundation.
If you would like to explore this field further, you are welcome to do so:
If You’re Feeling Drawn
I offer a free 45-minute conversation — a chance to meet, ask questions, and sense whether this way of working feels right.
I encourage you to make use of this, so that we can both get a sense of whether the work is a good fit.
To walk beside soul is to walk attentively —
with care, curiosity, and a willingness to be with what is alive.
If something in you, or in the world you are moving through, is stirring — a question, an ache, a quiet pull — I invite you to begin a conversation.
*Images with monastic clothing reflect a past period of life and its ongoing influence on my character, and do not indicate any current affiliation, authority, or representation of a religious institution.